I blew up a Camry today (first time!)

So I'm driving along, minding my own business, checking for a tire
vibration. I pull away from a stoplight under full throttle (4cyl) to get
up enough speed to make it wobble, 1st gear, 2nd gear, thir-- BAM!!! A
gigantic blue cloud poured out from under the hood over the windshield,
and it sounded like someone turned on a blender full of wood screws. Then
everything got quiet, the pedal stiffened, and I coasted to a gentle stop
while small pieces of metal bounced off the under carriage.
I sat there for a second, turned on the hazards, pulled out my phone and
called one of the guys at the shop.
"Look, I'm about 100 yards down the road, get five guys and come help me
push. I don't know. Something bad."
While I was waiting I popped the hood and put on my diagnostic hat.
Calling on years of experience and technical study, I was able to
determine that the grapefruit-sized hole above the oil filter with the top
half of a connecting rod and wrist pin (no piston, just the wrist pin)
hanging out was most likely to blame. I also noticed that a particularly
eager piece of cast-iron tried to make it out through the hood, but not
without leaving a small dent.
The help arrived soon, and I tried not to think about the negative
publicity I was giving our dealership by having a crew of it's own push a
car down the town's main street after having been detonated by a
technician. By the time we got back word had spread and a glorious crowd
had gathered to witness my handywork. Handshakes, pats on the back, I even
got lunch bought for me (made that last one up).
I've never had this happen to me before, I've only ever witnessed the
aftermath. The oddest thing is the lack of warning. After we got it back I
checked the oil level (full) and pulled the valve cover, but found no
evidence of sludge. The thing was purring beforehand - no knocking or any
other indication that such a violent end was right around the corner for
this poor little 5S-FE. I never did find the wheel vibration, either.